Strictly Platonic
by daffodil431
Summary: A collection of one-shots (that are kind of related to each other :) ) outlining the non-romantic relationships of the Dexholders. Tried to make it funny, so read! First up: Gold and Yellow!
1. Yellow and Gold

**Disclaimer: Don't own Pokespe. Well, Hannah and Alex are just Team Rocket Grunts I made up, but Team Rocket is not owned by me. It's owned by Giovanni. ANYWAYS…**

**AN: Here it is, Gold and Yellow! I've always found it cute that all three Johto Dexholders have been surprised with the fact that Yellow's older than them. This story doesn't really play on that, but I thought it was cute. Right. To the story:**

"Isn't this fun!" Yellow said happily, grinning at her Rattata. Gold suppressed a groan and nodded weakly back at her. Yellow had asked if either he or Crystal were free to go fishing with her, since Red was away at the Indigo Plateau. Crystal, seeing this as her chance to have a Gold-free afternoon, had fiercely insisted that he go. Gold was never that good under pressure, especially pressure from Crystal, so he hastily agreed. And now, three hours later, he found himself sitting in the grass, half-heartedly holding a fishing pole as _absolutely nothing_ happened.

"Hey, Yellow," he said for conversation, "Did you bring many Pokeballs?"

"Oh, no," she looked taken aback, "I don't want to catch these Pokemon! I just like meeting all new Pokemon!"

"Oh." _Well, that's just great._

Gold sighed and stared down at the water. His own sullen face stared back at him. He made a face and his reflection mirrored it. He chuckled, until a Goldeen stuck its head up and made a face at him. "Whoa!" he swerved backwards, startled, as the Goldeen snickered meanly and dove back into the water. He scowled down at the now clear water, his bad mood worsening.

"So, Yellow," Gold said, resigned, "Not to be rude or anything, but this is super boring." Yellow turned to look at him, and he continued, "And the Pokemon are super mean to me!"

"It'll get interesting," Yellow responded with a knowing smile, "I promise." Gold sighed and looked back at the water.

_I'd like to see that Goldeen come back, _he though spitefully,_ I'll show it! It'll know that it never should have messed with me!_

_You realize that this is a GOLDEEN, right? _A voice inside his head said, _Like it's a Pokemon. Chill._

_Shut up, _He told it, _No one likes you._

"Yellow," he whined, "Nothing interesting is happening!"

Yellow gave him a sideways look, a secretive smile on her face, before turning back to her fishing. About three seconds passed before a loud BOOM came from down the river and Gold, startled, slipped off the precarious cliff over the river they were sitting on and landed in the water. He resurfaced, spluttering, and looked up at Yellow, who was already packing her fishing rod into her bag and returning Ratty to his Pokeball.

"Well, come on," she said brightly, making her way down the river. Gold climbed up behind Yellow and hurried after her, confused.

"Wait, Yellow," he tried as they walked down the banks, "Did you, well, you seemed like you were expecting- I mean, did you _know_-" Before he could finish, Yellow stuck her hand out and stopped walking, making a shh-ing noise. Gold immediately shut his mouth, something that wasn't too common when it came to him.

The two of them peeked out from behind the tree that was in front of them. With Yellow's petite stature, they looked rather comical, Yellow's head sticking out from behind a tree and Gold's head above her.

"Team Rocket!" Gold hissed immediately, making Yellow shh him again.

And indeed it was Team Rocket.

"Hurry up," one of the Grunts, let's call her Hannah, hissed, "We need to be back at base as soon as possible!"

"What do you think I'm doing," said the other Grunt, let's say Alex, who was knee deep in the water, "Having a freaking tea party?"

"Oh, shut up," Hannah snapped, "Just get going."

As Yellow and Gold watched, Alex grabbed a Magikarp out of the water and tossed it to Hannah, who threw it roughly into a cage and shut the door. The cage was already filled with about ten Magikarp, and Alex and Hannah seemed like they weren't done yet.

"Hey!" Yellow jumped, startled, and looked behind her to see that Gold was no longer standing there. Instead, he was making his way towards the Grunts. "What do you think you're doing?" he demanded, "You catch Pokemon with _Pokeballs_ not a cage!" Yellow's eyes widened and she started to make her way over to where Gold was standing, glaring at the two Grunts.

"Get out of here!" Hannah snarled, "You have no idea what we're doing!"

"Yeah!" Alex called, "I mean, if you knew that we were going to force all these Magikarp to evolve into monster Gyarados, then you'd be pretty scared."

"Excuse me?" Gold shrieked, his voice high pitched and cracking like a prepubescent boy's. Yellow almost giggled at the horrified look on Gold's face, but decided that this wasn't the time and adopted a similar expression.

"You idiot!" Hannah moaned, throwing a rock at Alex's head, "I can't believe you just gave away our plan like that!

"You can't _do _that to Pokemon!" Gold ranted, throwing his hands around in desperation, "Do you _know_ how much that stunts their development? A LOT. A Pokemon should be allowed to grow properly, at its own pace! That's the only way it'll have a proper foundation! Not only that, it traumatizes them! A happy Pokemon is a strong Pokemon, I say. And how the hell would you even force them to evolve? I mean, I'm no evolution expert, but even I say that sounds stupid. And mean. And wrong." Gold glared at them. Yellow clapped enthusiastically.

"As if a _little kid_ would know anything about this," Hannah huffed, and then pulled out a Pokeball, "Let's show them a thing or two about the real world! Zubat!"

"What?" Gold groaned, "You've got to be fucking with me. Zubat? Are you serious? Do all of you Rockets have exactly the same Pokemon?

"Zubat, astonish!" Hannah screeched.

"Go Kitty!" Yellow yelled and Gold jumped out of the way and Yellow's Butterfree sent supersonic towards the Zubat. "Keep it up, Kitty!" Yellow called as she and Gold ran over to the cage to free the Magikarp.

"Get away from there!" Hannah yelled. Alex rolled his eyes, climbed out of the river, and pulled out a gun, pointing it at Gold and Yellow.

"Hands up or I'll shoot," he told them. Gold and Yellow froze, staring at the gun.

"Whoa, man, not cool," Gold said, his hands over his head, "What do you think you're-"

"Silence!" Alex yelled, looking very pleased with himself, "Now, I'll bet we'll get a lot of money holding two kids for ransom, huh, Hannah?"

"Right!" Hannah agreed, dreamy eyed, "We'd get thousands of Pokedollars! And then I can buy jewelry! Lots of jewelry! I'll live like a king!"

"Yeah, and I can get all the burgers I want!" Alex added, "And I can just eat and eat and eat and eat!"

"With gemstones! Shiny gemstones!"

And ketchup and ham and tomatoes!"

"Oh, and necklaces! Fancy necklaces!"

"Except not cucumbers, because those are gross."

"Oh, we'll be rich!"

"And full!"

Gold looked confused, and then turned to Yellow with a worried expression on his face. Yellow looked unperturbed, and even had a small smile on her face.

"Now," Alex said, turning his attention back to the two kids, "Hannah, tie them up."

"Gladly," Hannah smirked evilly.

"What seems to be the problem here?" A booming voice echoed in their skulls. The four of them turned to see a large, man-like Pokemon, hovering a couple of inches over the ground, giving them a disapproving look.

"Mewtwo!" Yellow called happily, beaming, "What brings you here?"

_Mewtwo?_ Gold's eyes widened. The _legendary_ Pokemon? What was it doing here?

"I felt a disturbance in the force," Mewtwo said dramatically before shaking his head and looking down at Yellow, "No, actually, a Magikarp that swam down to Cerulean Cape told me what was going on, and that I had to come help. He was very insistent."

Alex gave Hannah a confused look before turning and firing a couple of shots at Mewtwo. Which, of course, bounced off of his shield.

Mewtwo turned slowly and gave the two Rocket Grunts a withering look. Pretty soon, the two grunts were knocked out and Mewtwo stood exactly where he was, looking very pleased with himself.

"Well, if that was the only problem," Mewtwo said, "I guess I'll be going. Nice to see you, Yellow, strange goggled boy," he inclined his head towards them and sped off, Gold staring open mouthed after him.

"But the- the- Mewtwo- Ye-yellow-" Gold tried, but Yellow just grinned at him.

"Come on," she said brightly, "Let's get the Magikarp back in the water!" She skipped off, leaving him dazed.

Gold didn't say anything as they cleaned up the clearing and dropped the two grunts off at Officer Jenny's place. When they neared Professor's Oak lab, Yellow said, "See, I told you fishing would be fun!"

Gold narrowed his eyes at her. Did she _know?_ No, she couldn't have. There was no way. Right?

Before he could say anything, Silver and Crystal walked out of Professor Oak's lab, smirking when they saw him and Yellow.

"Hey, Gold," Silver teased, "So how was fishing?"

Gold looked at him for a while before breaking out into a grin and saying, "Actually, really exciting."

"Oh, don't lie, Gold," Crystal rolled her eyes, "No offense to fishing, Yellow, but Gold isn't really the 'sit and do work' kind of person."

"No, really," Gold protested, "It was really cool! There was Team Rocket and Pokemon poaching and then Mewtwo showed up and-"

"It's okay Gold," Silver said mockingly, "You don't have to make stuff up. We know you were bored out of your mind."

Gold saw Yellow smile knowingly before walking away in the direction of her little cottage. "Hey, Yellow!" he called, running after her, "Wait up! When are you going fishing again?"

**AN: How'd you like that? Well, I wouldn't know unless you REVIEW…! Anyways, you can review with comments on this one, or any suggestions of pairing or situations that you want that pairings to be in, for the future.**

**The next one is either going to be Silver and Gold, or Green and Yellow. I think. Unless I have a burst of inspiration and write a whole other pairing.**

**I told myself that I would update this one every SUNDAY, and I tried to get myself to wait until Sunday to post the first chapter. But obviously, I couldn't. I wasn't… strong.. enough.**  
**Regardless, the next one's probably coming next Sunday, cause I really don't know if I can get it done by this Sunday. Exam week peeps. :P**


	2. Silver and Gold

**Disclaimer: As much as I'd love to own Gold or Silver… I don't. Or any of the other Pokemon characters. I don't own any of them**

**AN: Okay, so here's Gold and Silver! So, some of you might notice this story's resemblance to a KevJumba video. Right, it's not like I got my idea from it. I had the idea before, and I just got some points from that video. In any case:**

**Disclaimer part 2: I don't own that KevJumba video. I am not KevJumba. Cool.**

**AN: Right, so it's Silver and Gold's bromance, but I had to add a little SoulSilvershipping. And I don't mean that 'I couldn't help but add it'. I literally had to add it. My best friend kind of said that she'd disown me if I didn't add at least a LITTLE BIT of SoulSilver in here. Right, so enjoy!**

**AN (again, like two months later): Oh my god, you guys, I wrote this like three months ago. I have no idea why I didn't put it up. Well, actually, until about six minutes ago, I had no idea that I hadn't put this up. Wow. Anyways, terribly sorry for the delay, chaps!**

"Hey Silver!" A voice rang out from behind him. Silver shut his eyes tightly and sped up his gait, hoping to outrun the golden eyed boy trying to catch up with him.

In a few seconds, Gold, on his skateboard, pulled up next to him. Silver stopped walking, sighing in resignation. Gold was on his _skateboard_, he didn't stand a chance.

"So, Silver, are you busy tonight?" Gold asked, a sly smile on his face.

"Yes," Silver answered automatically.

"Doing what?" Gold challenged.

"I've got to go out to dinner with my sister," Silver lied smoothly, shrugging his shoulders.

"Really?" Gold said, a look of mock surprise on his face, "Because I was just talking to Blue, and she said that she managed to convince Green to go on a vacation retreat to Sinnoh with her for a week. So, you couldn't possibly be having dinner with her!"

"My… other sister?" Silver tried, cringing at the terrible lie.

"Nonsense!" Gold declared cheerily, looping his arm around Silver's and dragging him down the street, his skateboard under his other arm, "We're going to have a blast!"

Silver groaned. _And so it begins…_

* * *

After an hour, Silver found himself wondering how he got himself in this situation.

Gold had taken him to a bar, and had gotten himself drunk enough to be convinced that Silver needs his help to find a girl. "You," he told Silver, pointing a finger at him, "You are, what twenty years old? Yeah, because I'm twenty years old, so you should be twenty years old. Unless it's after December, which would mean that you'd be twenty one. Is it after December?"

Silver sat silently, sipping his drink, waiting for Gold to realize that it was September.

"Whatever," Gold shook his head, "Well, you're twenty ish years old, and I've never seen you have a proper girlfriend! You need to get married, dude, and have tons and tons of babies, and then I'll take care of them until they pop out of their eggs. Then you can have them."

Silver, despite all his annoyance, was slightly amused. Gold was way more smashed than he thought.

"Well, I think I'll help you!" Gold's face lit up as if he had just figured out one of the universe's greater truths. "I'm the best Wingman evahhh! Hang on, don't go _anywhere_!" And with that, Gold sped off.

A few minutes later, he returned, dragging a petite girl with brown pigtails behind him. "Haaave you met Silver?" he introduced, grinning like a madman. **(AN: Yes, yes, it's Barney's line from How I Met Your Mother… :) I just thought it was very appropriate).**

"Hey, Silver, I'm Lyra," the girl said, grinning sheepishly.

"Hey Lyra," Silver said, smiling begrudgingly, "Sorry about him," he stuck his thumb out in Gold's direction, "His goggles are on a bit too tight." Lyra giggled.

"Hey Lyra," Gold prompted, "Isn't Silver pretty?" Lyra gave him a surprised look, and Gold continued, "Tell him he's pretty." Silver groaned, feeling his cheeks heat up. "Tell him, tell him, tell him," Gold chanted excitedly, bouncing a bit on the balls of his feet.

"What?" Lyra blinked, looking concerned.

All of a sudden, Gold was distraught, on his knees, sobbing, "Why won't you tell my friend that he's pretty?"

"Um, yeah, he's pretty," Lyra said quickly, looking frightened, "Um, I need to leave, but, I'll see you around, Silver!" And with that she escaped.

"Ah, don't worry about her, man," Gold got up, clapping Silver on the shoulder, "She was a bitch. I bet she was gay. Do you want me to go ask her if she's a lesbian? I will. I will go-" Before he could take a step, Silver grabbed the back of his shirt, dragging him back and sitting him down on a bar stool.

"Don't you dare get up," he told him darkly, and Gold complied.

But he never shut his mouth.

"Hey, hey!" Silver looked up to see Gold talking to the girl sitting at the bar next to them, "Hey, this is my friend Silver," Gold pointed to him, "And he's suuuuper hot. And you're super hot. You guys should make a baby." The girl shot him a disgusted look and got up to walk away. "You should!" Gold yelled after her, "Maaake a baa-"

Gold scowled as the girl walked away and turned back to Silver, "It's okay, bro, she was ugly anyways, don't worry about a thing, there's like a billion magikarp in the sea, I got you." Silver sighed.

"Hey!" He called across the bar, making several women look back at him, "Hey, look at my friend! Isn't he cute?" Gold reached out and grabbed Silver's face, tugging it forwards, "Look how cute he is! Don't you want to kiss him?"

Silver growled at his friend as tried to shove him off. "Gold, get off of me," he grunted.

"I bet you all want to kiss him!" Gold continued, slurring his words, "_I_ want to kiss him. Come here, Silver Mwah Mwah-" Silver flailed desperately and pushed Gold off of him in a panic.

Gold, undeterred, sprang up and snatched up a passing girl. "Hey!" he grinned maniacally at her, "Don't you want to date my friend here?" he asked her bluntly, gesturing towards Silver, "I swear, his junk is huge!"

"What?" Silver blanched, turning red, "What the hell, Gold?"

"I promise," Gold kept telling the girl, who looked weirded out, "I've seen it!"

"Gold, shut the fuck up," Silver snapped, before turning to the girl and saying, "No, he hasn't."

"Yes, I have!" Gold turned and yelled in Silver's face.

Silver ran his hand through his hair tiredly, seriously reconsidering his life choices.

"Hey, this is my friend," Gold yelled, his voice hoarse from all the screaming, "And he needs to get laid!" A few girls shot him disgusted looks and Silver tried to sink into the ground.

It was when Gold started singing some funny Usher song that Silver finally had enough and hit him over the head with a bottle. It shouldn't have been hard enough to knock him unconscious, but Gold didn't get up from the ground. Alarmed, Silver bent down, only to find that Gold had fallen asleep.

"Useless bastard," Silver grumbled, struggling to pull Gold up off the ground and wrap his arm around his waist to get him out of the club.

"Um, Silver?" he heard a girl call his name. He turned to his left to see Lyra standing there. He immediately let go of Gold, who fell to the ground with a loud thud. Lyra winced and peered down at the other boy before shrugging and looking back up at Silver.

"Lyra!" Silver said, surprised.

"Um, well, I know you've been having a rough night," she looked down again at Gold's slumbering form, "But I was just wondering if you wouldn't mind registering my number in your PokeNav, and maybe we could go out sometime?" She hesitantly asked, looking unsure.

Silver stared at her for a while, and then smiled slightly. "Sure," he agreed, pulling his PokeNav out.

"That's great!" Lyra beamed, "I'll call you later okay?" She waved at him and walked off.

Silver stared after her for a while, before leaning down to support Gold again, feeling much better than he did before.

By the time Silver made it to Gold's place, he was cursing Gold and life and every single deity he could think of for making him best friends with this idiot. He trudged up to Gold's door, hoping to God that Crystal was there, since she would stay over at Gold's place whenever she worked late at Professor Elm's lab. He banged on the door roughly and it was opened by an irate Crystal.

"Hey, you didn't have to-" she began angrily before catching sight of them, "What happened?" she gasped, moving aside to let them in.

"Oh, nothing," Silver grumbled, depositing Gold not so gently on the couch, "You idiot boyfriend decided to get drunk and set me up with half of New Bark Town, that's it."

Crystal's eyes widened and she giggled. "That must have been funny," she laughed.

"Ha, not so much," Silver said tiredly, "Now, I'm going to go home. Maybe sleep a little. Walk off this murderous rage." Crystal laughed and he left.

THE NEXT MORNING:

"Hey Silver!" Crystal caught up with him, "You left your PokeNav at our place yesterday!" She handed him the device.

"Oh, right," Silver looked down at it and stuffed it in his pocket, "Yeah, I was worried about that."

"Also," Crystal added slyly before Silver could turn away, "I had a nice chat with _Lyra_ this morning."

Silver stiffened and turned to face Crystal, his eyes wide. "You never told me that you met a _girl!"_ Crystal shoved his shoulder, her eyes shining. Silver didn't say anything. "Anyways, she seems lovely, and you're taking her out for lunch today, and we decided that you'd meet her at La Chat, because that's _perfect_ for a first date. So make sure you're there at 1:30 _on the dot, mister_! And it wouldn't hurt to bring flowers."

Crystal kept chattering as they walked down the path, telling him what to do and what not to do on his date with Lyra.

And, for some reason, Silver couldn't bring himself to hate it.

**AN: And that is all, it is done. This was actually on the shorter side, but whatever. Review my brethren! Review! Review! Review! Anyways, next would be either Green and Silver, or Pearl and Diamond. I think.**


End file.
